August 2011
13 posts
Hot Lixx Jr. finds woom to maneuver
US Air Guitar, LLC, and its partner companies and wholly owned subsidiaries across the globe, extend a hearty congratulations to air guitar legend HOT LIXX HULAHAN (Craig Billmeier) and his wife MARY RHODES on the announcement of their first pre-child gestation sac. Be it masculine or feminine, we have pink cigars for all.
UNITED STATES TAKES 'SILVER METAL' IN AIR GUITAR...
Congratulations to NORDIC THUNDER (Justin Howard) for bringing the silver medal to the United States of America!
–Gold medal conferred upon a girl named Devil’s Niece from Germany.
In the court of popular opinion, and above all my heart, Nordic was unquestionably among the finest performers the world stage has ever nearly collapsed under.
Congratulations also to Nordic Thunder’s...
Finland Round 2 Scores, before the Finns know it
Thanks to MATH ROMANCER for being so romancy!
Headed into round 2:*
Devils’s Neice with a 17.2 three way tie for 2nd: Like a virgin, NORDIC <censored> THUNDER, Eva with a 16.9 L-Bird - 16.7 Your Daddy with a 16.3 Mathromancer: Gunther with a 16.2 Mathromancer: Walker and The bandit tied at 16 and ZERO <censored-fucking> PROSPECTS with a 15.9 !!
*Not...
Live blog from Air Guitar World Championships in...
5:44 AM Eastern: Check back at 4:00 PM Eastern for a wrap-up of the Air Guitar World Championships in Finland! (USE THIS LINK FOR CHAT — The one on the AGWC site is lacking chat so you have to go directly to the ustream feed through this link).
STREAMING BEGINS AT 10:15 AM PACIFIC / 1:15 PM EASTERN!
Live video from your Android device on Ustream
Female invasion of World stage
CANNONBALL MAVIN upstages Jesus in the land of Finnish Evangelical Lutherans.
OULU, FINLAND – Both CANNONBALL MAVIN (Chelsie Jangord) and ZERO PROSPECTS won the Dark Horse, officially sent to the World Championships by a panel of foreign judges picked by lottery from among the 26 competing countries. Among those judging were the world renowned air guitar researcher Amanda Griffkin, Russia’s...
Murder, herrings, and aggressive sauna lessons in...
Björn Türoque (Dr. Daniel Crane) rides amongst his fans.
OULU, FINLAND – Today marked the first official day of Finnish wackiness. To wit: 20 air guitarists riding bicycles through Oulu’s mean streets (dubbed Murder Tuira – “murder town,”where rarely are people stabbed less than 23 times in a single attack), a lecture and discussion panel on air guitar moderated by a woman receiving her...
May all your lands also be Swamps in addition to...
I’m not quite sure how this fits into the US Air Guitar fold, but Denver competitor DYIN’ CLETUS (John Humphrey) just held his own Magic: The Gathering tournament and I was lucky enough to come across his recap. It’s hysterical, for wizards and non-nerds alike.
Hey Magic fans,
What a day! After nine gruelling hours of card flopping, the dust has cleared on Tribal Tournament 2011, and a...
Air Guitar World Championships this Friday!
8:15 PM Finland / 1:15 PM Eastern / 10:15 AM Pacific
“The climax of the air guitar season, the breathtakingly thrilling World Final will be battled at Oulu Market place on Friday 26 August. The evening gathers together the best air guitarists from over 20 countries plus the victorious dark horses. Only one can be the best of the best,the airiest of them all, and take home the shiniest trophy! In...
Local Fenton Air Guitarist Can Hold His Liquor
Flipping through the Fenton, Michigan Tri-County Times, as I do most Thursday mornings, I stumbled upon this article snippet:
Intoxicated Holly man At 7:45 p.m. on Thursday, Aug. 11, Fenton police responded to the Gazebo in downtown Fenton after learning that an intoxicated man was interfering with the concert. Lt. Jason Slater said a 47-year-old Holly man had wandered up to the gazebo and played...
Air-Rock Rocks the op-eds
East Coast competitor AIR-ROCK OBAMA (Jesse Rifkin) published this op-ed article in the Chicago Tribune. For those of you who get your news exclusively from the US Air Guitar blog, opposite the editorial pages (thus “op-eds”) appears a section of articles whose insight into the week’s most popular happenings is so erudite that the paper runs them despite having no official...
Champions: BRIDE OF ROCK – Catch a Little...
The second round of the 2010 Los Angeles Regional was loosely based on those X-Men scenes where Professor Xavier freezes the universe and anyone still animate responds with a side-to-side “holy fucking shit” look across their faces. When BRIDE OF ROCK (Janice Gomez) climbed over the Troubadour’s balcony railing and leapt into the sea of holy fucking shitters, I pretty much holy fucking shit...
Are you ready to rock, Topeka?
While US Air Guitar has no official ties to this enterprise, that doesn’t mean we don’t wish we did.
